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Funny Christmas Messages

Christmas is a time for joy, family and eating your body weight in cookies. These funny Christmas messages bring the festive giggles.

25 messages · free to copy

  1. 01

    Merry Christmas! May your cookies be plentiful and your relatives be on their best behavior.

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  2. 02

    Merry Christmas! I hope Santa brings you everything you deserve. Fingers crossed it's not coal.

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  3. 03

    Eat, drink and be merry, because January starts the diet. Merry Christmas!

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  4. 04

    Merry Christmas! Wishing you a holiday with more cookies than calories.

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  5. 05

    Merry Christmas! I was going to get you something, but then I remembered you're already perfect.

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  6. 06

    Here's to ugly sweaters, overcooked turkey and very competitive board games. Merry Christmas!

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  7. 07

    Merry Christmas! Remember, calories don't count between December 24 and January 1.

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  8. 08

    Merry Christmas! May your Wi-Fi be strong and your family arguments be short.

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  9. 09

    I told Santa you've been good. Please don't make me a liar. Merry Christmas!

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  10. 10

    Merry Christmas! The best gift is family, but socks are a close second.

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  11. 11

    Merry Christmas! Let's celebrate by eating cookies for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

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  12. 12

    Merry Christmas! May your batteries be included and your instructions be simple.

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  13. 13

    Wishing you a merry Christmas and a quick recovery from the food coma.

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  14. 14

    Merry Christmas! Santa's watching, so maybe save the cookies for him. Or don't.

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  15. 15

    Merry Christmas! I hope your tree stays upright and your lights stay untangled.

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  16. 16

    Merry Christmas! The elves said you're on the nice list, but just barely.

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  17. 17

    Here's to stretchy pants, holiday movies and pretending to like fruitcake. Merry Christmas!

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  18. 18

    Merry Christmas! May your holiday be merry and your in-laws be brief.

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  19. 19

    Merry Christmas! I hope Santa got the memo about the extra-large stocking.

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  20. 20

    Merry Christmas! Wishing you peace, joy and someone else doing the dishes.

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  21. 21

    Merry Christmas! If you can't be good, at least be festive.

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  22. 22

    Merry Christmas! Let it snow, as long as someone else shovels.

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  23. 23

    Merry Christmas! Don't worry, the gift receipt is in the box.

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  24. 24

    Merry Christmas! Wishing you a holiday season as warm as your new socks.

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  25. 25

    Merry Christmas! May your eggnog be strong and your naps be long.

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How to write funny Christmas messages

Funny Christmas messages are perfect for friends, siblings and coworkers who'd rather laugh than get misty-eyed. Joke about the universal stuff: too many cookies, terrible sweaters, family games that get way too competitive, and the January diet that never quite starts.

For a group card at work, pick something light like the office party or holiday leftovers. For family, a gentle tease about the turkey or the annual argument over the TV remote is part of the fun. Finish with a warm wish so the card still feels like Christmas.

Questions people ask

What's a funny Christmas card message?
"Merry Christmas! May your cookies be plentiful and your relatives be on their best behavior." Light, festive and relatable.
Are funny Christmas cards okay for coworkers?
Yes, keep the humor about food, holidays and office parties, and avoid religious or personal jokes.
What do I write in a funny Christmas card for family?
Tease about a family tradition, like the overcooked turkey or competitive board games, then wish everyone a cozy holiday.

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